Friday the 13th in Slovakia: Why does this keep happening to me?

December 13, 2013

In the morning it was very cold as I made my way back into Slovakia and continued north towards Kosice where I was looking forward to having a place to couchsurf. It was wonderful to be back, travelling once again through the small villages on the small roads. In the afternoon, however, the road became annoyingly up and down, up and down and I got quite frustrated. But then I got to Kosice and all appeared well.

One of the great things about Slovakia (and Hungary) is that they have Tesco, which I thought only existed in the UK. And the best bit is they have the old style Tesco Value products!

Slovakia's entry into my competition to find the World's Best Bus Stop To Sit And Take A Break. Well, ahem, yes, sorry to say you haven't made the finals this time, but thanks for coming

More on the side roads which were not cleared - this one led to another cave that was also closed for the winter

My couchsurfing host Gejza (played by Anthony Hopkins) came to meet me on his bicycle and took me to his flat. In his fifties and living with his wife, who was not at home, Gejza made some tea and told me some of his travel stories and started talking about his 'cabin in the woods.' On his couchsurfing profile it stated that he could host people at this 'cabin in the woods.' This had made me worried because I never use cars so I preferred to find a host in the city itself, so I had written to Gejza stating that "I don't use any motor vehicles or public transport, I only ever go by walking or bicycle" and on my profile it also says "I never, ever, use cars." These seemed like pretty unambiguous statements to me and Gejza had replied that it wasn't a problem because we would meet in the centre and he lived walking distance away.

It was a bit of a surprise then when I asked where we were actually going to be staying that night and he told me "at the 'cabin in the woods'" and when I asked how he proposed to get there he said "Well in my car of course."

I flatly refused, it was out of the question. But I couldn't stay in the flat because his wife didn't like couchsurfers. As a compromise I said I would cycle to the 'cabin in the woods' and Gejza would drive there and we could do it that way because he said it was only 12 kilometres away.

But before we did any of that we walked into the centre of Kosice and had a look around. Kosice was in fact the European Capital of Culture for 2013 and this night was the closing ceremony and so there were lots of people around and plenty going on. The centre of the city was really nice, a wide pedestrian street with an old church. There was a big stage with live music, a beautiful lighted ice sculpture and a Christmas market. At one stall Gejza stopped to buy some honey liqueur and asked if I wanted one. Clinging to my recently discovered teetotality I said "No thank you" and yet was not the least bit surprised when my host returned with two glasses. Listening is not one of Gejza's strong points. He told me it was made with honey and herbs and was very good for you. 'Well if it is for medicinal purposes I guess its okay' I thought, and drank it.

The Slovakian band wrapped up in coats. It was quite funny when they shouted to the crowd "Are...you......cold?"

Now it was time to head for the 'cabin in the woods.' Gejza took his car and I the bike. I was told that it was five kilometres to a turn off the main road, where Gejza would wait for me and then from there it was just another seven kilometres uphill into the dark forest until we would come to the 'cabin in the woods.' As I was cycling out of the city and towards the darkness I suddenly remembered that it was Friday the 13th (seriosuly, how often does this happen?!) and that I was cycling off to meet an almost complete stranger at a 'cabin in the woods.' I had a horrible feeling that I had definitely seen this movie before, and that it was definitely not of the 'action-adventure' genre. Having survived the last potential Friday the 13th horror movie scenario in St Petersburg (against the advice of my beating libido) I was quite determined to do the same again now. The fact that Gejza was not the most beautiful woman in the world was of great benefit in this regard. Still, he did not look a weak man and I could not guarantee my success if it came to an armed battle at the 'cabin in the woods' especially as I was still armed only with a blunt pocket knife. As I was now cycling in almost complete darkness I became quiet paranoid about my host and realised with some horror that I had not seen his wife at all and that in his flat there were no pictures of his family and I was now quiet sure that all that was a mere cover story and he was planning to chop me up and eat me. To be fair to him, he didn't really seem like that kind of guy, but then they never do, do they?

In any case, at this point the road split in two and I did not have any idea which one to follow. I had already cycled six kilometres and it was only supposed to be five to the turn off. I followed one road, decided it was wrong and went back to the other one, started on that and then decided that was wrong and then decided the thing to do was wait at the fork because Gejza had said he would drive back and find me if I wasn't there in half an hour. When he did, he told me which road to take and said that it was actually five kilometres from the edge of the city to the turn, not five kilometres from his flat. So now it was really getting quite late and I essentially still had twelve kilometres to cycle, all uphill through the dark woods, and at the end of it I was expected to fight for my life in a gory horror movie at a 'cabin in the woods?' No thanks!

I said that it was really too far for me to cycle now and that I could easily camp in the woods just outside the city. I'm sure for many of Gejza's couchsurfers a night in the woods is a tremendous novelty, but for me it isn't quite so much, and I had rather been looking forward to the novelty of being somewhere with central heating and running water and electricity. Gejza told me that it was silly to camp in the woods and I could stay at his flat after all, and his wife would just have to lump it (not his exact words).

So we went back down the hill into the city and back to the apartment block. As I walked into the kitchen Gejza was waving a knife at me which did nothing very much to put me at ease, at least not until he cut up some cheese and offered it to me. Then his wife, who did exist after all, came home and was very careful not to say hello or even enter the same room as me at any point. Gejza, now appearing much less like a psycho killer, showed me some pictures from his recent trip to Madagascar. He is a photographer and frequent traveller, and the pictures were really amazing. It made me want to buy a better camera so I could take such high quality shots, until I was told how much the camera cost and then I decided that memories are more important than photos! I went to sleep on the couch and another Friday the 13th had been survived without any bloodshed or anyone being cut up and eaten even a little bit.

Today's ride: 80 km (50 miles)
Total: 10,883 km (6,758 miles)

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