June 20, 2016
A Little Advice In Strict Accordance With The Teachings Of The Church Of The Great Outdoors
Bagley, Minnesota
I took a chance on some backroads today and it paid off big time in terms of low-traffic splendor. When there is low traffic I get the urge to do goofy things like ride down the middle of the road, or on the wrong side of the road, or wherever I feel like riding at the moment. I sometimes ride with no hands. I sing very loudly. (Today it was a few Neil Young songs.) I pee on the side of the road while still straddling my bike. I'm FREE to do whatever I want.
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I had a long southward stretch on a county road that varied little from what you saw in the photo above. In addition, there was a pretty strong crosswind that had me on the verge of registering my first complaint. It was time for an attitude adjustment and today I discovered the very best antidote for the boredom of unchanging landscapes.
Some landscapes are more scenic than others. That much is obvious. Most cycle tourists don't need relief from hour after hour of mountainous vistas or desert canyons, but then again, perhaps some do. I don't know--everybody has his or her own preferences I guess. But more commonly, people get bored when riding in farmland or prairie settings. Personally, I'm more likely to get bored in forest settings. I call trees "view blockers" because, well, you can't see anything beyond them. At least on the prairies you can see a water tower or grain elevator in the next town six miles away.
Whether your visual nemesis is constant mountains, deserts, scrublands, farms, prairies, or forests, I believe I can help. When you think you can't take it any more, just STOP! Take a short break and look around. Be as objective as possible. Find some living thing you wouldn't have noticed while pedaling your bike--like a butterfly or a wildflower or a distant cow. Like an individual pine needle on a tree or an ear of corn on a stalk. Like a common housefly or a crow. Like a sun-baked cactus or a ditch weed. Whatever living thing you find, just look at it for a couple of minutes. And here's the most important part: Find a private place to use the Great Outdoor Restroom. Breath in the air. Listen to the stillness, or the breeze, or the howling wind, and LET IT FLOW!
That's what I did a little south of Oaklee, MN and I focused on the swaying grasses and the chirping of crickets . . . and it worked . . . just as it has in the plains of Montana and the cornfields of Illinois and the forests of Wisconsin. I'm not some kind of New Age healer--I'm just the Pope of an obscure new religion--but remember this technique on your next bike tour. I can almost guarantee that you will remember that "boring" place for the rest of your life.
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In the afternoon the winds picked up considerably and I was glad to be finishing up my day in an eastward direction. Outside of the town of Fosston, I reversed direction for a minute to get to a highway rest area and the wind was a killer. If I had been forced to face that wind all day long I would have just quit. I'd set up my tent at the side of the four-lane highway and wait for one of two things to happen:
- The wind would let up and I could start riding again.
- The state patrol officer wakes me up and hauls me to jail as a vagrant.
I'm glad I didn't have to deal with either scenario. I just rode with the wind into Bagley for the last part of my day. At the Bagley City Park Campground, the wind is becoming increasingly ferocious. I'm writing this in what should be a perfect 72-degree temperature, but I'm wearing a long sleeved shirt and wind breaker to protect me from the cold breeze blowing in over Lake Lamond.
Today's ride: 65 miles (105 km)
Total: 954 miles (1,535 km)
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