Scatter brains

June 25, 2023

DAY ZERO

Let's be honest, we're all sick of the super neatly organized photo drops from influencers that have their hotels paid for.

I leave tomorrow for a 1000+ mile bicycle trip I’m calling the Midwest Triangle in search of UAPs. That’s right, aliens, flying saucers, little green men, greys, Mulder and Scully, Skinner. The truth is out there. My things are spread in a terrific mess on the floor in front of me. In some ways they match the way I feel. But don’t get me wrong, I’m ready. The weather claims we will have severe storms blowing through today, yesterday we watched a near civil war of the Russian military, another train derailed into a river somewhere in Montana and there was a police standoff at 4am in my neighborhood last night. Maybe I’m depressed. Maybe this is what I’m running from? There is no escape from this perfection of evolution. Maybe I’m happy. Either way I’m watching spacetime unfold at a blistering speed. Memories gobbled up by a simple lack of planning. I’ve done very little preparation for this tour. Fine. I want to see what happens instead chasing expectations. I only hope it doesn’t rain while I set up my tent, if I’m hoping. I’m leaving the genie lamp behind. No wishing.

I’ll prolly leave Dayton a bit late. Drag my feet, drink coffee and have breakfast. Use my bidet one more time before I go. I’ll head W towards Richmond and then turn NW on the Cardinal Greenway in Indiana. I’ll be in Chicago well before the July 4th holiday. One thing I did do is reserve and pay for an Airbnb so that my wife and son can drive up and spend a couple days with me. We’ll watch fireworks and avoid large crowds. Nothing against Chicago, mass shootings happen anywhere and everywhere, and I’d avoid bunching up regardless of locale. This is America, where understanding the rules of engagement is taught through fear and bigotry. Quick lessons from a rat-tat-tat textbook.

And then I’ll turn SW and pedal towards St. Louis. I may roll through Peoria if I can reach some friends by messenger and they show interest. Otherwise, I’ll just keep trucking straight to that Arch in the sky. Forbes just released a “most dangerous cities” story with St. Louis at #1. I have enough cash saved to get a motel room with thick curtains I can hide behind. I’ll peek through them occasionally and shiver with fear while I plot my escape. I’ll clean my water bottles and be off when there’s a break and the masters of war are preoccupied.

From St. Louis I turn back E and head towards Indianapolis and then home. This is a hectic stretch of storm territory and I don’t carry an umbrella. Mary Poppins be damned. I’m sure they have ditches I can hide in and I’ll be sure to shake hands with a chimney sweep on my way out of the city. I expect it to be hot. Should I buy more sunscreen before St. Louis so I don’t have to pass the tranq addicts on my way to a store? We’ll see.

There’s my route, my pretrip paranoia, and the extent of my planning. Maybe the aliens will give me a lift? Otherwise, buckle up disability and let’s ride!

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