January 29, 2025
Day T10: Reconnections and New Connections
There wasn't much sleep to be had last night as this location in the middle of Chiang Mai brought back all these anxiety nightmares from 2020. The silence of the hotel, the sense of being alone and facing monumental life decisions was scary. There were really three options at the time, none of them great. An emergency life coach was consulted at the very last minute before everything started to shut down and go online. Those three or four days waiting and assessing options felt like forever.
ChatGPT as always provided a lot of helpful insights on all this.
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"The real lesson from 2020 isn’t about what you did—it’s about how you processed uncertainty and how you would respond differently now. Ask yourself: would I let fear drive my decisions again? In 2020, you made the best decision you could at the time based on fear and limited information. Now, you’ve built a stronger sense of discernment and self-trust. Would you still act in fear, or would you stay calmer and more strategic? 2020 caught everyone off guard. But now, would you have a personal contingency plan? For example, if another global shutdown were to happen, would you have:
- Multiple residency options?
- Accessible bank accounts in different currencies?
- A diversified set of income streams?
- This isn’t paranoia—it’s rational, calm preparedness.
"In 2020, many people (yourself included) followed the safest possible route. In hindsight, staying too long in China turned out to be a mistake. Now, do you feel more confident in making smarter decisions rather than just “safe” ones?
"Now in 2025 your mind is echoing a new version of those same fears: Could another pandemic happen? Would I react the same way? How much control do I really have over external events? Your brain is asking 'Did I really learn from 2020 or will I panic again in a future crisis? You are absolutely right: another crisis will happen at some point whether it's a new pandemic, economic collapse, war, or something else. But nobody had perfect information in 2020 just as nobody will have perfect information in the next crisis. The key question isn't if another global emergency happens, it is how you handle uncertainty when it does.
"You also raised a broader question: how informed are we as a society, really? If a pandemic happens again, would we actually handle it better? The reality is, most people won't. Governments will still panic, misinformation will still spread, and people will still react based on fear, not data. Instead of focusing on whether society learned from Covid (which, let’s be honest, it probably hasn’t), the real question is: Did you?
"The fear you feel now isn’t just about another crisis happening—it’s about the uncertainty of how you would react. But here’s the truth: you are not the same person you were in 2020. You now recognize how fear operates. You understand the importance of staying flexible, not locking yourself into one place. You’ve built a lifestyle of optionality—multiple bank accounts, international networks, the ability to live in different places. You now have a much higher tolerance for uncertainty and ambiguity.
"So instead of asking, “Will I act in fear again?”, ask yourself: "How do I embrace uncertainty rather than fear it?” “How do I ensure I never feel ‘trapped’ again—no matter what happens?” The quietude of Chiang Mai isn’t something to fear—it’s an opportunity to process what 2020 taught you. You’ve already proven that you can adapt to the unpredictable. You’ve already won the battle with uncertainty. Now, it’s just about trusting yourself to do it again when the time comes."
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Just reading this made me feel so much better. Once again, ChatGPT proved itself to be a miracle, and it might end up putting all my life coaches out of business. Then again it probably won't. We agreed on many of the chats that the most powerful way to leverage AI is to combine it with human elements as well.
In related news, a Chinese copycat AI model called DeepSeek entered the market and at first the reaction was complete fear. The tech stocks tanked accordingly. But later they recovered somewhat because while DeepSeek relies on cheaper chips to generate smarter responses, it uses a process called distillation to basically copy from ChatGPT. And it does this while filtering out any political references. As an example above, take what ChatGPT said about opening multiple bank accounts around the world and using different passports as a geopolitical protection strategy. All I can say is good luck hearing anything like that from DeepSeek.
As soon as everyone panicked with the DeepSeek news, I immediately went ot town and bought tons of shares of US tech stocks including Nvidia because it was immediately predictable what was going to happen, and I turned out, once again, to be correct.
With all that out of the way, I woke up to find that my friend Jen and her partner Joe were still in town. This was odd, as Joe had apparently left for urgent business. In the end it turned out there was a booking error with his flight, basically the same mistake I had made. They are both creative types just like me and sometimes we make these dumb mistakes. He was supposed to fly out last night but the ticket was booked a month later.
So it turns out that Jen was at McDonald's and I biked out to meet her. It was a cool and clear day, and traffic was much thinner than Bangkok yet for some reason it was more chaotic. Before I could get there, an expat riding a bike met me out of nowhere and wanted to have a chat. He was especially interested in my Montague and wanted to buy it on the spot. This was incredible! I told him I was in the market to sell it and Jen was actually helping me on expat forums but this chance meeting she had nothing to do with. The asking price was 9000 baht, but he talked me down to 7000 baht, which is around $210 or perhaps 20% of the price I bought it for. Considering it's nearly 15 years old and still in reasonably good condition I figured this was a fair price. We chatted about many other things and he was impressed with the folding feature as well as other things I hyped up.
We added each other on Facebook. I told him I was doing one last hurrah around the Mae Hong Song loop with this bike then I would take it back to Chiang Mai and have him buy it off my hands.
But given that Jen's time was very limited and she was solving one crisis after another with her and her partner, I had to cut short this incredible impromptu chat and meet her. We had a ton of things to catch up on as well. I hadn't seen her since before all the covid madness. She was technically in Shanghai the same time as me during the lockdown but we were totally isolated (as you can imagine) and she even went to the quarantine camps. Later she moved to Pai where she then met her partner and is still processing lockdown PTSD (as I am too). But as it turned out now, her partner was off to Japan to start a restaurant business and literally flying out. Both of them were divorced and it seemed this current relationship was nearing its natural end as well.
I was invited to have lunch with them nearby their hotel, but first needed to check out of mine. The whole situation felt like complete chaos. I eventually met them at their place and yes it was chaos. After more chats and food, I was sent off with a Jewish blessing which is a first (Joe is from Israel). This was quite remarkable as I had just met a Muslim couple two days ago and had Allah bless my trip too. Top it all off, Jen is Christian so I can now claim that I've had blessings from all three major world religions. How's that for a trip.
Whereas the Muslims will say 'Inshallah' the Jews say 'Berzhat Ashem' which means more or less the same thing but different connotations.
Realizing at this point I wouldn't get very far at all, there was still one more errand: the post office to mail back the room key I had forgotten. That was simple enough and only cost 54 baht. While in the mall with the post office, I also realized I had forgotten to charge my phone and tried to tackle the situation.
Earlier, while Jen and I were doing an impromptu fitness session, she said "I can see you're totally still on survival mode. We both need to focus on self care." She is right. Nearly two weeks into this trip and I can't shake the survival mode from that horrific job. It comes and goes, but it was all the more necessary to leave this city of Chiang Mai that was getting on my nerves for sure and bike to the mountains. Chiang Mai was just too chaotic and busy.
So yes, survival mode had me doing things like booking wrong flight dates, forgetting guesthouse keys, and not charging phones at night. Thankfully though, due to my minimalist setup I was safeguarding valuables constantly and in no danger of losing anything really important even in times like this.
While looking for somewhere to charge my phone, I tried to order a coffee at Starbucks and they wouldn't take cash. They insisted on QR codes which actually create more friction than make life easier. While I have a Thai banking app that works with these QR codes, I need to register in person at the bank with my ID and a photo to use it and that's a hassle.
Clearly this was a sign to get out of the city once I could. I then set a course and bounced. The first 30km were on some wide motorway that bypasses Hang Dong, and a good thing too since the regular road was used to go back and forth from the life coaching center during early 2020. Cycling that road again would have brought back too many painful memories, especially just sitting there at a 7/11 crying and wondering what the fuck I was supposed to do. I couldn't bear to revisit that today.
Eventually the turnoff towards Mae Chin arrived and at that point things really began to change. The road narrowed and traffic thinned out. Signs of the beautiful countryside began to emerge and then more mountains and rivers. I met a group doing river kayaking and we had a nice quick chat. They wished me well on the biking. Then there was a beautiful temple on the side of the road, another nice coffee shop with a gorgeous view, and then finally the homestay resort. There wasn't much in the way of food options, but the resort owner told me to quickly make my way back to town before the restaurant would close at 6pm. It then got dark and everything was quiet at 7pm.
It made Pattaya seem like a distant memory.
Today's ride: 53 km (33 miles)
Total: 334 km (207 miles)
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