D23: 儋州 → 福山

February 9, 2025

A few days ago, I'm not certain how many, a Chinese guy in the comments section of one of my videos (I'm presuming a coffee one) said something about an Ethiopian wife that he had started a coffee importing business with in Fushan and how—if I was passing anywhere near there—she/they would very much appreciate a visit.

I subsequently eyeballed my remaining supply of the Beans of Life, calculated something approximating an efficient route to the Fushan Coffee Town, realized this would put me there with no more than two days of coffee still in my bags, and—thinking that buying some of their beans would be less hassle than organizing a shipment (as well as hella tastier than local coffee)—immediately scheduled my going that direction.

Not quite "Places Named Marriott" series, but really close

Modern day shophouses next to one from the 80s

Cover your mouth when coughing or sneezing

Prior to this, although the plan had been to turn inland from Wanning, I had been intending to continue with the current vaguely starburst pattern of coast → highlands → coast → highlands. This, however, would not only mean going all the way back over to the northwest side of the island, it would also require some very careful jiggery pokery in order to both "not cross my earlier path" and "continue onwards without returning to Haikou."

I would still have to change my plans five or six more times as I did things like decide to stay in Danzhou instead of Lanyang (20y cheaper and came with an elevator), and as someone from a job I'm not going to talk about in detail until the contract is signed first said she'd meet me in the afternoon at the Coffee Culture Garden and then said she didn't have time after all.

Some insanely gaudy unfinished shopping tourism project across the street from the Yummy Market where I got yogurt

Decent weather and small roads make today a huge improvement over yesterday

I feel like the typhoon that led to this bridge getting a warning sign to drive carefully cause damaged railings was not a recent one

Given that I also have a paid video scheduled for a traditional local version of Lantern Festival which I've attended on at least five prior occasions, I much prefer "my coming back into the city to meet her" to "her coming to meet me" cause even if the past few days' combination of weather and hotel room facilities had loaned themselves to my doing laundry¹ (and they didn't), this would either mean meeting her while somewhat ripe smelling, or it would mean changing into off-bike clothing that isn't appropriate for northern Hainan this time of the year.

Furthermore, if she had come, I would have had to leave my hotel room before the sun warmed the world, and I would have had to spend the whole day on the National Road with no detours of any kind.

Something weird going on with the amount of money they claim to have spent on building it

Although it was vastly more visually appealing than the past two days, I won't go so far as to say that today's ride was interesting or beautiful. The winter Kaiju we refer to as the Giant City Eating Fog Monster of Doom² doesn't just consume Haikou, it also snacks on most of the upper third of the island. Provided you don't recognize the crops in any of my photos, you would be hard pressed to believe this is a tropical tourism destination.

However, being as I got to spend almost all of it on little county roads that wiggled back and forth across the countryside from one village to another, and because I knew I had a specific destination that was going to have copious hot water, multiple washing machines, a soft bed, and fresh morning coffee, I was in a fabulously good mood that no amount of intermittently drippy skies could kill.

Even if the 万 is in the wrong place, it still cost too much

Lovely details, don't recognize any of the figures

One of these days, someone will explain to me why some idols get words and other ones get figures

Being as I hadn't discussed any kind of work or business with the husband and was not introduced to his wife or his relatives until after I was on the road on the day I was scheduled to arrive, I made the very reasonable assumption that while I might be getting a free dinner (if I arrived early enough), I probably wasn't getting anything else.

However—and this really should have occurred to me—as he had contacted me in the first place because of knowing of me as a wanghong, this was a very silly assumption on my part.

I wouldn't have thought that building old enough for a "Fewer Children, Better Births" slogan

I've now crossed the Sports Themed Resort³ between the expressway on ramp and the Coffee Culture Town off my list of places to ever consider staying. Painfully hard beds⁴, didn't need to check the back of the TV for them to fail the dust check, scummy water in the mosquito breeders (aka "decorative ponds"), and—my personal favorite—half of my shower area eaten up by a disconnected, broken washing machine.

All for the low, low price of someone else spending at least twice what I would have paid at the place I know.

Even better than the broken, disconnected washing machine in the shower was the handwritten sign taped to the mirror telling guests not to use the sink to handwash clothing⁵

Abandoned primary school sharing a campus with a temple that probably predates the school and was originally where kids in this village were educated

Seen from across a probably artificial pond, there's another shrine on the outside of the school gate

I have no idea why I took this photo, leave a comment with your best guess

But, hey, even if I forgot to photograph them, I had cartoon basketball players on my sheets with speech bubbles that said "I like dunk," and, if I wanted or needed to hit the gym, they apparently⁶ have a full-sized professional grade one.

¹ Rinsing in the sink and hanging up under the air conditioner is the bare minimum to not stink. It is not "doing laundry". Doing laundry requires actual laundry soap, which shampoo is not. Also, in this weather, it isn't really possible if the room doesn't have heat†.

† Even at hotels that cost a lot more than what I'm paying, having an a/c that provides both cold and warm is quite unlikely in Hainan.

There's something special about being stuck in traffic like this and randomly having a truck driver call it "hey, I know you, I watch your videos online"

² During the worst years of China's air pollution crisis, northerners couldn't understand how an island with so little manufacturing had the same problem. This is because Haikou's fog is a natural combination of ocean fog and mizzle.

³ That's both a description and the name

⁴ Hard enough that I managed, as someone who has slept on a kang†, to have bruises in the morning.

† A northern Chinese heated bed that is made out of bricks!

Picture sent to the woman I wasn't meeting for an interview to let her know it's a really good thing we didn't meet today, cause I'm still an hour from where she was planning on meeting me

Not even trying to go for a camouflauged fake tree look

⁵ Although this specific sign doesn't say why, the usual reason (which is made obvious when I ignore the sign) is that the sink basin is too shallow and you'll get water all over the floor.

⁶ Given the overall level of maintenance at the parts of the resort which I saw, and my not having any reason to visit it and see what it was like, I'm thinking it may have been professional grade when it was installed, but I'm doubting that it is currently "professional grade".

Photo sent to the Ethiopian woman and her husband to let them know I'm getting close

Today's ride: 73 km (45 miles)
Total: 1,595 km (990 miles)

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