January 20, 2024
DAY FOUR: Lake Rebecca Ice Camp to Hastings Inn Honeymoon Suite
The BIG Day
'Twas a BIG day, a magical day, a made-in-fairytale-heaven-day for our bike touring couple. 'Twas a wedding day. 'Twas also a sub-zero day when they awakened on their own private acre of lake ice. 'Twas a day they rolled over and went back to sleep because the only important thing that had to be accomplished was getting to the church on time.
[I don't know what possessed me to use the contraction, 'twas,' so many times in one paragraph. I can only surmise it was some kind of ghostly Shakespearean aspiration that took over my normal sense of writing for the common man.]
The second time they woke up, the sun was shining through their paper tent. Panic set in. They looked at their phones and realized they only had an hour to pack up their tent & gear and race mostly uphill--for 17- cartoon-miles--to Roadside Park. That's where they had planned to meet the high priest of the Church of the Great Outdoors for their wedding ceremony.
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10 months ago
10 months ago
10 months ago
They were only 20-minutes late when they arrived at Roadside Park. Doris and G-2 considered that to be "fashionably late." The priest had a different view of the tardiness. He was shivering and thought to himself,"those cartoon characters are damn lucky I didn't ride off and leave them on their own to find a Lutheran or Methodist or Scientology or Jehovah's Witness minister to provide a last-minute wedding. Good luck on that!"
************
Within a couple minutes, everybody calmed down and got into place for the ceremony. It was a wedding that befitted a couple of bike touring superstars.
The setting was perfect. Located in the gazebo of a city park frequented by homeless people, it could not have been more romantic.
The bride looked stunning in her pure white Yves St. Laurent wedding dress. Well, it was a knock-off, made by a dude named Iver Saint Larry. Close enough.
The groom was dashing in his Armani-like lycra, which he purchased at the Goodwill store for $10.75.
Add to that, a semi-professional videographer was on hand. Speaking of hands, his hands were colder than the priest's face, which was pretty bloody cold. Even so, the video guy did a pretty good job of filming the beautiful event. Check it out!
Heart | 5 | Comment | 2 | Link |
9 months ago
9 months ago
After paying the exorbitant fees charged by the videographer and the Church of the Great Outdoors priest, Doris and G-2 only had $55 left to their name. That wasn't even enough to pay for a night in Hastings' cheapest, dingiest motel.
It was a sad scene, but the ending wasn't sad. The priest took pity and returned his $5 fee. After seeing that, the videographer did the same thing. Thank the God of the Church of the Great Outdoors, our heroic couple now had enough money to score the "Honeymoon Suite" at the Hastings Inn.
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The next couple hours were private time for the two cartoon newlyweds. After that, they took a timed picture which they were willing to share. It showed them enjoying their favorite activity (except for bike riding.) They love watching cartoons on TV.
Heart | 5 | Comment | 2 | Link |
9 months ago
Today's ride: 2 miles (3 km)
Total: 90 miles (145 km)
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Comment on this entry | Comment | 4 |
On another note, you cannot go wrong with accommodation providers who will also sell you whitegoods. I hope they had a free laundry room there.
10 months ago
10 months ago