D3: 定兴 → 清西 (双语)

September 20, 2024

It's cloudy when I get up, raining when I leave. By all rights, anyone sensible would immediately look out the window and say "guess I'm working on Dr. M's book today."

However, on top of my known proclivities for not being sensible, my hotel room is mehtacular, and—even knowing that "no foreigners" doesn't usually¹ come from a place of xenophobia—I have zero desire to give these people more money than my initial paid-for reservation.

我起床时天气多云，离开时却下起了雨。按理说，任何聪明人都会立刻朝窗外看看，然后说：“今天就该翻译M博士的书了。”

然而，我就有不聪明的倾向，而且我住的酒店房间很差劲。而且——即便知道“不接待外国人”这话通常并非¹出自排外心理——我也丝毫不想给这些人比预订的费用更多的钱了。

On the way out, the same lady who pulled "we have no vacancies" on me as well as "we aren't licensed" and "but you might not like the room," asks if I'm actually going out in this weather. Surely I'd rather stay another night?

出门时，之前跟我说“我们没房间了”“我们没接待外宾的许可”以及“但你可能不会喜欢那个房间”的同一位女士问我，这种天气真要出门吗？难道我不想再住一晚？

I was amused by the name² of this Sex Toy Shop 这家情趣用品店的店名²有意思

Unexpected Furniture Series 没料到在这儿碰上的家具系列

All I'm thinking is, given that you seem to own this place named Marriott, how many people have you inconvenienced over the years with your ignorance³? And, are you going to pull this shit again in the future?

我心想，你看起来是这家“万豪”的老板，这么多年来，你因为自己的无知³给多少人带来了不便呢？而且，以后你还会再干这种破事儿？

I say nothing. Just head out to the donkey burger place that's been recommended in the comments section of the previous night's video⁴.

It is immediately understandable why it was recommended. But, even with taking the time to make a video of me very much enjoying a second one (and after having had my morning oatmeal no less!), there's a limit to the amount of dawdling I can do, and I'm off in search of the Yicihui Stone Column.

我什么也没说，径直朝昨晚视频评论区里⁴有人推荐的驴肉火烧店走去。

一下子明白它被推荐的原因了。不过，即便我花时间拍了个视频，展示自己吃得津津有味，吃了两个（而且还是在我已经吃过早上的燕麦粥之后呢），但我能磨蹭的时间也是有限的，随后我就出发去寻找义慈惠石柱了。

Casualty of second round simplification or local variant? Seen multiple times today 第二轮汉字简化的后果还是地方变体？今天已经看到好几次了。

First 4g advertisement of the Tour 此次骑行中碰到的第一个4G广告

Absolutely adorable town courthouse 超级可爱的镇法院

A war memorial to the soldiers and generals who put down an uprising in 527, it's been inscribed as a National Key Protected Cultural Heritage Site since the first batch of sites were listed back in 1961. As a result, given the way that the government likes to do things, it ought to be a whole heckin' lot more than a column under a weather shelter.

那是一座纪念在527年镇压起义的将士们所建的战争纪念碑，自1961年第一批国家级重点文物保护单位公布以来，它就被列为国家级重点文物保护单位了。结果呢，按照政府行事的风格，它可不该仅仅是个遮雨棚下的石柱呀。

But, unless you count the pair of stelae commemorating the Shunzhi 7 (1651) and Tianshun 3 (1460) reconstructions of a temple that's no longer there⁵, that's really about all there is. In the meantime, the rain has gotten both heavier and colder and when I stop biking, I stop making warm, so I leave pretty quickly along a road that no one in their right mind would walk a bicycle down but which has to be better than going back out to the truck route⁶.

但除了那两块纪念顺治七年（1651年）和天顺三年（1460年）重建一座现已不复存在的寺庙⁵的石碑之外，真的就没别的什么了。与此同时，雨下得更大了，也更冷了，我不骑车，身体就不暖和了，所以我很快就沿着一条正常人不会骑行的路离开了，不过这条路总比大货车走的路⁶要好些。

There are many puddles. Most of them don't have require me to get off my bike and walk through calf deep water.

Most of them.

路上有很多水坑。大多数坑还不至于让我得下车蹚着及小腿深的水走过去。

大多数是这样的。

I stop for lunch at the first restaurant on the G112. It gets me warmed up enough to be cold enough to shiver when I go back outside and I pull off at the next gas station to layer up with everything I can easily pull out of my bags. This isn't much but it's enough to make the shivering stop.

在112国道上的第一家餐馆，我停下来吃午饭。这顿饭让我暖和了些，可等我再出门时，又冷得直哆嗦，于是我在下一个加油站停了下来，把包里能方便拿出来的所有的衣服都穿上了。虽然没多少衣服，但好歹让我不哆嗦了。

From there on in to Yi where I'm heading for the bike shop. In this city—although I always end up stopping at the XDS, because XDS are supposed to be the better choice in places this size—Giant is the place to be. They sell me a patch kit, a multi tool, and a carry bag that I can jury rig on to my rear rack (and which will provide useful in the next Repacking) for 50y.

从那儿我继续前往易县，我要去那儿的自行车店。尽管我总是会在易县的喜德盛停下来（因为在这种规模的地方，喜德盛应该是更好的选择）在这座城市捷安特才是我该去的地方。他们卖给我一套补胎工具、一个多功能工具，还有一个我可以临时装在后货架上的驮包（这在下次重新打包时会派上用场），一共花了50元。

Stele from the reconstruction of the temple that isn't there 重建那座已不复存在的寺庙时留下的石碑

National Heritage Site marker 全国重点文物保护单位标识牌

My last two times in Yi (2022 and 2018) involved the police and the Foreigners Issue and I'd really wanted to see if the city had gotten better, but I'm cold and cranky, I haven't gotten enough kilometers in for the day, and it's early enough that "but why don't you go somewhere bigger" is the sort of stupid justification that's going to fall out of someone's mouth, and I just don't want to deal with it.

我前两次（2022年和2018年）来易县都牵涉到了警察以及外国人住宾馆相关事宜，我本来很想看看这地方有没有变好一些，可我又冷又烦躁，今天骑行的里程还不够，而且时间还早，别人很可能会说出“你为啥不去个更大的地方”的这种蠢话，我可不想去理会这些。

So I ride another 15km to the Western Qing Tombs and, instead, stay at a rural guesthouse where distractions like my needing to dry my passport keep us from remembering to register me, and the other guests share their dinner⁸ with me.

于是我又骑了15公里，来到清西陵，然后住在了一家乡村民宿里。在那儿，因为我要烘干护照所以我们都忘了给我登记。其他住客也和我分享了他们的晚餐⁸。

Is it time for my annual joke about traditional concrete roads made of water and mud? 又到了我一年一度调侃那种水和泥铺成的“传统水泥路”的时候了吗？

¹ Even at the height of Covid restrictions, when nutters on the street were yelling at random foreigners that this was our fault, it was more likely to be a case of "your lack of a Chinese ID card means you fall outside the realm of things I know how to do, and I don't want to get blamed for doing things wrong" than it was a discrimination born of hatred.

¹哪怕在新冠疫情防控最严的时候，街上有些疯子冲着外国人叫嚷说这都是我们的错，那也更可能是因为“你没有中国身份证，这意味着你超出了我所熟知的范畴，而且我可不想因为办错事儿而受指责”，而不是出于仇恨的歧视。

² "一套" can mean "a complete set of", so "我们有一套" could be "we have a complete set of relevant products." However 套 is also one of the words for condom, so it means "we have a condom."

² “一套”可以表示“一整套产品”，所以“我们有一套”可以理解成“我们有一整套相关产品”。不过，“套”也是避孕套的一种说法，所以它在这里的意思也是“我们有避孕套”。

Just what every rainy day needs 下雨天正需要的就是这个

On the old main road heading in the direction of the Tombs 在通往清西陵方向的老主干道上

³ It is always possible that active misinformation on the part of her local police is behind her not knowing relevant policy. Given some of what I've previously experienced in this general region, it's even quite likely. It's just that, instead of leading with the "I'm not allowed" excuse beloved of people who actually believe they aren't allowed, she led with "no vacancies," and that reads to me as: "not only have I failed to check the details on the incoming reservations that I confirmed, I also can't be bothered to listen to you say 'I have a booking.'"

³有可能是当地警方给她传达了错误信息，导致她不了解相关政策。鉴于我此前在这片区域的一些经历，这种可能性还挺大的。只是，她没有先说“我不被允许接待外国人”这种那些真觉得自己不能接待的人爱用的借术语，而是先说“没房间了”，在我看来，这意味着：她不仅没核实好自己确认过的预订信息，而且根本就懒得听我说“我有预订”。

⁴ One of the keys to going viral, which I'm not usually willing to do, is to make a video of a foreigner eating a Beloved Local Dish. Extra bonus points if the foreigner doesn't like it or has never tried it. I have tried it, I do like it, and 524 comments later, I'm beginning to understand that I wasn't remembering wrong about it tasting a lot better.

⁴想让视频火（我通常不太愿意这么做），关键就是拍外国人吃当地特色美食。要是这个外国人不喜欢吃或者从没吃过，那就更有看点了。我吃过，也确实喜欢吃，而且在看到524条评论之后，我开始明白，我之前对它味道更好的记忆并没有错。

First outdoor wee of the Tour 此次骑行中的第一次户外小便

If only I'd known to wait 2km more... 要是我早知道再等上2公里就好了……

Ear piercing, hair straightening, hair perming, beauty treatments, shoulder massage, moxibustion, adjustment of the monthlies⁹ 穿耳孔、拉头发、离子烫、美容护理、肩颈、火疗、月子病⁹

⁵ And which a cursory bit of research seems to indicate was already Not There by the Chinese Civil War.

⁵ 粗略查了一下，似乎早在解放战争时期那座寺庙就已经不存在了。

⁶ Major improvements in road safety, vehicle safety, driver skills, and the amount of dust, dirt, and pollution kicked up by trucks merely make me willing to tolerate the truck roads when I have no other choice. A bad choice is still another choice.

⁶道路安全、车辆安全、司机驾驶技能等方面有重大改善，以及卡车扬起的灰尘、污垢和污染物的减少，只是让我在别无选择的时候愿意忍受走卡车走的路。虽说这是个糟糕的选择，但好歹也是个选择呀。

⁷ Haikou has a place called Steelbridge Town located next to the bridge the Japanese built across the Nandu River. So, it makes perfect sense that this village be named Stone Column.

⁷ 海口有个地方叫铁桥镇，就在日本人修建的横跨南渡江的桥旁边。所以，这个村子叫石柱村也就说得通了。

I could be on that road. It's wider, and flatter, with more hillcuts and better grading..... it also has trucks 我本可以走那条路的。它更宽、更平坦，有更多的开山路段，坡度也更好……不过路上有卡车。

17th or 18th century gate leading up to the Manchu ethnicity villages whose main role until the end of the Qing Dynasty was to ensure the upkeep of the imperial tombs 通往满族村落的十七或十八世纪的大门，在清朝末年，这些村落的主要职责就是负责皇陵的维护。

⁸ In return, I give them the pack of leftover Very Expensive Cigarettes I nicked off the table at one of the Gansu banquets.

⁸作为回报，我把在甘肃某次宴会上从桌上顺来的一包很贵的香烟送给了他们。

⁹ Abortion has been widely accepted and openly advertised as abortion my entire time in China, so there shouldn't be any need for a coded "women's services provided" from the era† this building/advertising dates to.

†Architectural style and materials put this building as being built sometime in the 90s. The window stickers material, style, and fading place it as early as 2000 but no later than 2010.

⁹我在中国的这些年里，堕胎一直是被广泛接受且公开宣传的，所以这座建筑/这个广告所属年代† 就没必要用隐晦的“提供给女性的那个紧张服务”这种说法了。

† 根据建筑风格和材料判断，这座建筑建于20世纪90年代。从窗户贴纸的材质、风格以及褪色情况来看，时间最早是2000年，但不会晚于2010年。

Today's ride: 58 km (36 miles)
Total: 248 km (154 miles)

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